Well as we sit in some unknown bar in Sheffield (an equally unknown city to my good self) which is doubling as our nights employer, waiting for the soundman to arrive I have decided to write. Four hours in a delapitated tour van that has seen many a band pass through its doors and subsequently pass out once again was witness to exactly that behaviour. And now we wait. Wait and Wait. Someone has taken to practicing in order to kill the time, someone else reads , couple of band members walk around and around and around the venue, everyone is frustrated that there is no free wireless. Ahhh.
One pleasurable aspect of touring is the
instantaneous access you have to every towns local branch of strange or unusual shall I say, people. Last night I sat backstage talking to a performer of sorts who explained to me that his act was to walk around with his girlfriend who would try and illicit the attention of passersby. When she was successful and a young man returned her interest the performer would step in and rage at him in a truly dreadful southern American accent.
Apparently he eked out a living doing this wondrous show although I cant for the life of me think of whowould employ him. Having said that I guess the same people who employed us for that night also employed him. It all started making more sense to me.
He also proudly proclaimed that London was the only town where you would get this behaviour. “Your band rocks up to play and BAM you have acts like us working along side of you, try getting this in Paris no you wont no where else, no where in Europe”. I replied “that’s why we’re going to Belgiumon Tuesday and have you been drinking the bands rider??”
Other support acts and encounters of strangeness so far on this tour have included a man who had a bullet fired at him which he caught in his teeth an escape artist who was disillusioned by his career prospects because as he put it “this country just isn’t interested in Escape artist like it once was unless your act involves huge props. So what am I expected to do …buy an oversize fish tank? I cant afford that”
Challenging decision for him to make.